


This is not what it looks like, I swear!

by Piripulix300



Series: Sanji-centered one shots [4]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Awkward, Cold Hands, Funny, Gen, Gym, No Sex, Roronoa Zoro Being an Asshole, Training, ZoSan - Freeform, crow nest, sanji is stuck, stretchable
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 03:27:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17072639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Piripulix300/pseuds/Piripulix300
Summary: The cook is not as stretchable as he thought he was. Zoro finds Sanji stuck in the training room, and he's too busy to laugh to help the poor cook.Zosan if you read between the lines.





	This is not what it looks like, I swear!

 

“This is not what it looks like, I swear!”

Zoro raised an eyebrow. He had barged in the crow's nest without warning because, why would he? He was usually the only one using the training room. Now though, he wished he had knocked at least. Finding Sanji with only his shorts and a leg up on the highest bar of the gymnastic ladder was not something he wished he had found. But never mind that Sanji used his personal training tools. It was not  _his,_ after all, it was  _theirs_ , even though he was the only one using them most of the time. What was really worth it was finding the cook  _here_ in  _this_ position! That was golden blackmail material! So instead of getting angry, Zoro  took the situation with a smile.

“Are you sure?” Zoro asked. “Because it looks like you’re stuck.”

“I’M NOT!”

Sanji’s face was an angry shade of red. He was clenching his teeth in rage but it was not terrifying in the least. Although he was too ashamed and too angry to take proper care of his reactions and to notice that Zoro was making fun of him. He looked so helpless with his leg up that the swordsman actually wondered for a second if he should keep on annoying him. It was just a millisecond of a doubt though, and Zoro swore that he would never falter again when confronted with this man. He crossed his arms in question with a smile. Sanji sighed.

“Luffy dared me to… Oh, you know what? Forget it.” 

Sanji started answering before stopping himself. The blond's face reddened again, and his eyes went back to the gymnastic wall bars. Zoro finished climbing and closed the hatch behind him. From the corner of his eyes, he watched as Sanji hopped and tried to unstuck his leg with no luck. Zoro knew when his presence was not welcomed, but he made a great effort to stare right at Sanji while he was taking his weights. Sanji was trying to be obvious to Zoro’s look, but it was a losing battle. He felt the man’s eyes on him and turned his head in one rapid motion. It was useless to hide his shame now.

“Are you just gonna stand there, moron?” Sanji snarled. His swirly eyebrow was twitching in tension. 

“Oh, sorry, am I interrupting something?”

Sanji seemed to finally get that he was almost naked, and he seethed in fury. No one knew if he was red from anger or from shame.

“I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING WEIRD, MORON!”

“Then I guess you don’t need me to help you, right? Or that’ll mean…” Zoro acted surprised, even if they both knew he was not. “That you could really be stuck after all?”

“Fuck you, grasshead.”

“Swirly!”

“Shitty marimo!”

“So that's how it is?”

Zoro unleashed one of his katanas -one would be enough- and Sanji turned on his heel with the full intent to fight, but then his face cringed in pain, and he slowly went back to the ladder, muttering curses to himself. Zoro closed his mouth and sheathed away his katana. He would wait for Sanji to be ready if he could get unstuck on his own. He smirked as he started training. He needed to show Sanji that his presence in shorts was not bothering him at all.

Sanji hopped a few more times, but it was apparently painful and he stopped trying. It took him way more time to speak aloud than it had to stop trying.

“Alright, I get it!” Sanji growled. “Can you… Can you help me?”

“Why?” Zoro smiled, knowing that this was a perfect occasion to bother the cook. 

“Cause I’m stuck...” Sanji mumbled.

“Sorry?” The swordsman knew he was adding fuel to the fire, but it was hilarious to watch Sanji trying to maintain his composure whilst wobbling on one leg in shorts and fighting to stay upright.

“I’m stuck dammit! My fucking foot's stuck in this fucking ladder! Why do you need a ladder in a fucking training room anyway? Shit!”

Sanji was waving his hands up and down frantically when he lost his balance and caught himself at the last second. His foot was so high up, that his short was making stretchy noises when he moved. Zoro burst into laughter.

“ _Stop_ fucking _laughing_ and come _help me!_ 'Cause if you don't, I'll...”

Sanji looked at the ladder. Due to his position, going up was impossible, so he held onto it with his arms and started kicking its base. That got Zoro to move his ass. He jumped in to help before the cook could destroy any more furniture. He approached him and held him by the waist. The cook went rigid and yelped, confusing Zoro who was about to lift him.

“What now?”

“Your hands are frigid, mosshead!”

“Hey, don't blame me! I'm trying to help, numbskull,” Zoro growled. He raised the cook effortlessly, and the blond took his foot out of the ladder with a sigh of relief. 

“You're the one that's half-naked in my training room,” Zoro continued. 

“I'm not naked.”

While it was true that Sanji was wearing that disgusting heart-shaped short, Zoro was paying it no mind. The thing was mostly cracked anyway. 80% of his job consisted in not looking down at this point. As soon as Zoro released Sanji, the cook made a beeline to a pile of clothes that Zoro hadn't noticed before.

“Are you gonna tell me what happened or not?”

The cook seemed to think for a while, then he reluctantly confessed.

“...See, I found Usopp and Luffy talking about stretchability, and Luffy showed his rubberiness. I was just hanging out to smoke, but they dragged me in the conversation and...”

He paused. Zoro waited a second before running out of patience.

“And what? They set you up this ladder, leaving your naked butt for me to find?”

“I WAS NOT NAKED! Seriously, marimo! It’s just that I didn’t want to tear my suit.”

Sanji faced him, now fully clothed. The cook sat on the bench that rounded the room and rubbed at his sore ankle. Zoro had started lifting weights absent-mindedly. He was too focused on Sanji's story to notice what he was doing.

“They dared me to stretch as far as Luffy could,” Sanji finished. 

“So you told them to take care of their own business and you came up here to try and beat Luffy at his own game?” Knowing Sanji's pride, it was easy to guess the rest of the story. 

“Hum-hum,” Sanji acknowledged him. 

“How long have you been stuck here for?”

Sanji made a vague sound with his throat but gave no answer whatsoever. Zoro chuckled. He went back to his weights and finally noticed that they were too light. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sanji's brain turning in his head. The cook was clearly still thinking about the question.

“Men's body is not meant to go at such extent,” Zoro provided.

“Luffy did it.”

“I stand my ground... Not a man. Plus, he’s made of _rubber_?”

Ah, now the weights were heavy enough. He lifted them with a slight sweat, failing to notice that Sanji was hiding his disappointment. Of course, the cook would still find a way to blame himself, but Zoro couldn’t care less. If he wasn’t strong enough to survive Luffy and Usopp’s taunts, he wouldn’t last a week. Sanji suddenly got up and went back to the ladder. He lifted his leg effortlessly and put it back on the ladder.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” Yelled Zoro. “Are you trying to get stuck again?”

“SHUT UP! Is this a training room or what?!”

Zoro could see why Sanji wanted to do this naked. It was just painful to watch the clothes stretch at impossible angles. But no way the cook was undressing when he had company. This was the occasion Zoro had been waiting for. He decided he would stay to... supervise the operation. Sanji caught him staring and hiding back a giggle.

“You still laughing?”

“Not.”

Sanji regained the calm chic that characterized him, then managed to do his training exercise in silence. Both of them were too focused to talk, especially with the weird experience that had just happened. However, when dinner time approached, Sanji left the gymnastic ladder and dusted his suit before heading to the hatch.

“Hey, cook.”

“…What?”

“You totally owe me one.”

Sanji left. But even though he was already out, Zoro heard him. And with that soft word, he was sure that Sanji would keep his promise.

“Shit,” Sanji snorted.

 

 


End file.
